By they way, everything in life is writable about if you have the outgoing guts to do it, and the imagination to improvise. The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt. ~Sylvia Plath



Monday, September 6, 2010

The Sun Coming Down on My Summer

It is the end.
That’s the only way to explain it.

The end of something beautiful.
The end of something relaxing.

The words “the end” make you sense it’s threat.
The word’s make you fear.

I don’t realize the end is so near.
It catches me off guard.

 
Life is fun; it’s complete.
Then I hear those words.


Dread fills all of my being.
The words envelope me.

I try to postpone it as much as possible.
But postponing never works.

It seems the more I postpone,
The faster it comes.

There is no way to stop it form coming.
I regret each day that I wasted.

It quietly lurks.
Waiting to catch me when I least expect it.
Then it’s there.
The end.

Giving in is my only choice.
I must go back.

I am helpless.
I am defenseless

I fall back into the routine.
The routine that had felt so good to leave behind.

The beautifulness and warmness is gone.
Replaced with cold and crowded spaces.

There is no way to escape.
I must stay strong.

The days eat at me.
Only two weeks in.

Panic fills my soul.
How can I survive the months to come?

This is torture.
It seems impossible.

Procrastination sets in.
It’s so hard to battle.

Two days is not a long enough break.
I need more time.

I need help.
I need sleep.

In past years it wasn’t so threatening.
The end didn’t scare me.

But this year was different.
I’d heard the horrors this year would bring.

Everyone of them was true.
They expect so much.

My brain holds so little.
It only wants sleep.

But there are no excuses.
No story to back me up.

It must be done.
No matter what.

But I have no choice.
I must hold strong.

I’ll count down the days.
Until the relaxing end.

Monday, August 30, 2010

Me As A Writer

I don’t remember the day I learned to write, or even how I learned to write. In my mind I’ve just always been able to write. I never put thought into the fact that I had to learn before I could have gotten to where I am now in my writing. Although I cannot remember how or when I learned to write, I do remember experiences that helped my writing ability grow to where it is today.

In my second grade elementary class writing was a big part of our curriculum. Each day my teacher would have a subject on the board that we were to write about in our journals. Most days, writing was my favorite part of the day. The subjects could range from something very serious, to something fun and silly. They could be something that required you to use imagination, or something just based on facts. Each day was something different; something new to explore. In the past I’ve found my second grade journal and read through subjects I got to write about. Although now my stories seem silly and incomplete to me, I know then I thought they were great creations.

One writing memory that sticks out to me the most in that class, is when older kids came in and were paired up with us younger kids. We spent time with our partner getting to know them, and then the older partner wrote a story for the younger one. I remember how excited I was the day I got my story. The were even bound up like books. It was a story about a little, shy, mouse, by the name of Keyara. I read it over and over, and couldn’t wait until I was old enough to write my own books.

I have always liked writing and to this day I still enjoy it very much. I have been in some great language arts classes that have helped me become a better writer. The classes have also taught me fun ways of writing. In my ninth grade honors language arts class I learned so many different types of writing. One of my favorite papers in that class was one that I got to use my imagination in. We got to write something like a fairy tale, or a tall tale. I wrote mine on how lip gloss came to be. It was such a fun experience to be able to just let my imagination flow and write something so fun. To this day it is my most favorite paper I have ever written.

Another thing that stuck out to me in that class, was when my teacher, Mrs. Card, gave a list of subjects to choose from to write on. I chose to write on an experience that changed my life. Mrs. Card told the class that there probably wouldn’t be very many students that would write on that subject because most of us hadn’t experienced something life changing at such a young age. Writing that paper was an awesome experience. Being able to tell the whole story and being able to put so much of my voice into it. Throughout writing the paper I learned more about putting voice into something you write. I also learned how much putting your voice into a paper can change the paper entirely. Anyone could have written on that subject or maybe could have had a similar experience as me, but writing a paper with your voice is what makes it unique. It was awesome to me to be able to learn that much about writing just through one paper.

Writing in or for a classroom setting has helped my writing capabilities and learning experience grow. I think I do better writing for an audience than I would if I were to just write for myself. I put more thought and work into the paper when I know someone will be reading it; especially teachers. I’ve never had a problem writing for teachers because I like being critiqued and given advice. If I just wrote the paper, handed it in and never saw it again, I would never learn anything. My teachers have helped me learn more about my writing just by correcting my papers. Sometimes, I may be a little disappointed when something I write comes back with marks all over it, but I know that the teacher is just trying to help me, then I can go home and work on whatever has been suggested and fix it before handing it in for a final draft. That way, I know when I turn it in for a final, I know that at least it is better than when I first started. Having peers check it also helps my writing because when the subject is something that relates to all of us as students, it helps to have a students opinion on it.

My writing capabilities have definitely grown over the years; although, they are nowhere near perfect now. My capabilities have not only grown from the help of teachers and students, but from my willingness to learn more about writing. I still have a great willingness to learn all I can about writing and I hope that not only this year, but for the rest of my life that my writing knowledge can grow and I can keep learning to become a better writer.